That'll be a no on the apocalypse thanks all the same

Dear unnamed religion whose members make a habit of arriving unnannounced at our front doors at inopportune moments with offerings of pamphlets, booklets and other such paraphernalia,

Apologies I missed your visit today. Please be assured that I was not inside peering through the venetian blinds in breathless silence waiting for you to turn on your heel and leave. I was in fact at work. However, please imagine my delight when I opened my front door only to trip over one of your colourful flyers, cheerfully inquiring "How can you survive the end of the world?". Congrats on the attention getting copy that's for sure. Less plaudits for shoving it uninvited under my front door. Sadly, I must take this opportunity to politely inform you that the end of the world is low on my list of worries at the moment. Furthermore, a flyer "warmly inviting me to come and listen to the answer" at the Boondall Entertainment Centre does little to entice me to attend, or indeed add "the end of the world" to my priorities.

The lesson is, when next you visit my little house save your paper. A flyer of any kind, no matter how apocalyptic in its tone and discourse will not persuade me to suddenly see your light.

Let's live and let live. How about that?

Yours sincerely
Wendy